Rendezvous with my self..

These two guys – PR and RA are temporary consulting employees in our team. They both come from the same South Indian state, thus speak the same language. I am one other desi in our team and understand their language. They are both good people, quite helpful and friendly.

I have, however, started getting aversive towards those two since some time now. Why ? Here goes :

* Discussion of all matters – Official or not, AS LOUDLY AS THEY CAN. So loud that those in the entire office building who understand their language now know : Why PRs wife does not like radish, What is wrong with RAs car and yeah, Which movie did each watch recently, complete with the good/bad review et all.

* More than 50% of the day is spent chit chatting. Who said women talk too much? Either in the cafeteria or in their cubicles or generally in the corridor these two are chatting away to glory.

* Have you heard of afternoon walks ? Yes, but for 1 full hour after an elaborate lunch at office? I kid you not, I was invited to join them, many times. Of course my reply was “No, Thanks” ( You enjoy your own thundering voice discussions about family and cars. Me not interested, Thanks).

* And this one is the worst. Proudly announcing that they have not done any work worth a minute in the entire day! “We are consultants. Why should we be bothered about the company? We come, pass time everyday and get paid good money by the hour. You permanent employees go suffer. Hahaha!” Those are the exact words from one of them when I jokingly said that I’ve never seen them busy at work.

The last one has been repeated for more than 10 times so far…of course the wording are different each time as per the context of the talk. Consultant or not, I would be disgusted to while away office time and proudly assert it as an achievement. Consultant or not, I would respect my place of work and my employer who pays for my daily bread. Yes, these old values still hold good for me.

Our team manager is a wonderful lady, very hard working and a totally positive person. She does not seem to notice or know about these two guys going la-la and time passing in the office. Not sure I must alert her or just shut up and do my job.

But then, I am afraid my disgust will just spill out someday, somehow when I cannot contain it anymore.

I don’t know.

On a slow moving evening, sitting in the backseat of a car on a long journey, I grabbed this magazine called ‘Little India’ with minimal expectations to pass time. What I got was this very interesting article by one Rohini Verma. It was so thought provoking that I endured typing out the whole article from paper to this space, since this piece didn’t make it to the online archive of this magazine. Chug along and see what I mean -

( Look for the marked lines that are truely applaud worthy)

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The thing about being a woman is that you are dealing with ‘issues’ all the time.

It makes you think about the fine line between not being taken for granted and still being a woman. Why does everything we do define out identity as a woman. And why does everything we do or don’t validate our opinion on gender equality. It’s just out there, no matter which social or economical strata one belongs to.

Somehow, somewhere in the fight to prove our worth as professionals we women just made things worse for ourselves. We increased our spectrum of expectations. Now we have more issues to draw the line on.

There are the traditional issues, such as should I do the dishes every time or should my other half chip in too? And the perennial social issue of how much is it my responsibility to ensure good relations between our extended families?

My parents are gratified when my spouse does the slightest thing for them. When it comes to my relations with my in laws, somehow nothing I do seems adequate. When championing any kind of social equality it becomes a fight across generations of thoughts.

Did the concept of equality somehow just permeate our generation? Did not my mother and my grandmother fight it? And if so what happened? Or is it just our generation that so naturally questions and rebels inequality? Why is it that we feel the need to draw the line? Don’t get me wrong; it’s not that I am sitting on the wrong side of the social fence. But it does appear that the hard won battle of equality of sexes in the boardroom, somehow just remained there.

Yes, we have the metro sexual caring man. When did being caring for your partner become so hip that we had to coin a new word ( metro sexual) to applaud the select few who are just doing the humane thing? When we draw the line, we are being aggressive, selfish, petty and sometimes worse. What should be a natural instinct in men, gets applauded with a fancy title.

Ladies, the men are still winning.

Regression may not be such a bad thing for us. That way we get to be the good people, the pressure and stress lessens on us, as does the workload. Maybe, being a housewife was our best bet. It seems funny that our own fight is beating us.

Sure, I love the freedom that I have now as an individual, the power to choose etc.,etc. But I wonder how much stress can our bodies take, because that is the downside of this fight. Are we equipped for this? And is this still our choice to make or has the sweet thought of equality put us in an autopilot-fighting-mode.

When do we say enough? That I think is the biggest question. Is it the absolute perfect gender relationship we seek? Does that even exist? How do we decide that we have reached there? Is it different for each of us? If so, how will we know?

Drawing the finish line is as important as the race itself. To be respected and treated as equal is our sovereign right, but we need to define the fight before we forget the fun of living.
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So, this noon I was at the cafeteria heating up my lunch box in the microwave when this Chinese looking guy walked up with his lunch box. As usual, I threw a brief smile at him and continued to do my business, when he said -

“Hi. So when are you planning for a baby?”

“Sorry??!”

“You are married for some years now, no? When will you have a baby?”

“Ah.. not sure yet.” ( WTF!! I hardly know this person. Why am I even answering him!)

“I think I’ll have another one by next year.”

“Oh, Ok.” ( Wow, thank you so much for this critical information Sir. What would I have done without it.)

“Bye then.”

“Bye” ( Phew! )

Does this kind of weird viva voce sessions happen only to me or such specimen with bizarre questions are common all throughout?

I am wearing a pretty little skirt and a tank top, a sweet smelling new perfume and feeling really bubbly today. I find myself involuntarily smiling away to glory at whomever walks by me today. They see it or not, I FEEL special today.

It’s by B’day !

The hubby started it sweet by waking me up at the exact tick of 12:00 in the night and wishing me with a passionate kiss that lasted 2 full minutes * blush blush*

He has booked tickets to visit the Niagara Falls and we are starting tonight on a long weekend trip.

First time to that ‘heard-a-lot-and-seen-too-many-pictures-already’ place for me.
Exciting..yes, yes.

One of my old buddies called up to wish me in the morning. ” Hey, you still seem to maintain the same old enthu of a little girl! I remember you Wearing a new dress, holding a pack of sweets, standing in front of the class and happily grinning when all sang ” Happy B’day to youuuu……”.

“Of course! I am still a ‘Complan Girl’ kano.I wish they did it in my office too.”

Yep. I am a bit crazy that way. It is quite easy to make me jump with joy.

Have been thinking of some topics to post recently. But, When I am this jumpy and beaming, I need to try really hard, thinking straight

So, this ‘Fives’ tag from my new friend DewDropDreams should suffice.

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“Each player answers the questions about themselves. At the end of the post, the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer.”

(1) What were you doing 5 years ago?

The exact same day, five years ago? That day was my b’day too. What a coincidence ?!

Jokes apart, 2003 was THE BIG year for me.

Graduated – College days sadly ended – Aggressive job hunt – First job – First salary – Got Engaged – Got Married.

Phew! I know, that sounds too much for one year. I can explain. But, that will take another 10 posts.

(2) What are 5 things on your to-do list for today?

- Complete the tasks for the day at office
- Get back home for an early dinner
- Last minute packing
- Get ready and leave to the airport on time
- End the day falling asleep in the plane leaning on hubby’s shoulders.

(3) What are 5 snacks you enjoy?

- Garama garam samosa
- Gelato, any flavor
- Crackers
- Pani puri/ Golgappa
- Corn flakes – crispy fresh in ice cold milk

(4) What are five things you would do if you were a billionaire?

- Hire some smart brains to come up with practical solutions to eradicate hunger and poverty in the world. Implement them.
- Buy a cozy house with about 4 bedrooms, a gym, a swimming pool and a HUGE garden full of flowers and a play area!

Don’t think I will be left with a anything else after the above two are fulfilled.

(5) What are five jobs you’ve had?

Five jobs?! I have had just two – Taught in a college for a few months then joined the rat race in the software industry.Still running the race.

I tag anyone who is looking for a topic to post and reads this . Enjoy maadi !

Will be back by monday. Tata now.